Any Suggestions for Indoor Activities in Berlin?

In the two forecasts below, one of these places in the middle of summer. The other is in the middle of winter. 

Glorious Berlin Summer

Rubbish Perth Winter

Vicky and I have some friends visiting from Perth this week. It's been piddling down pretty much the entire time they've been here. I'd like to blame them for the horrid weather, confusing the seasons, especially when last week was a little bit hot and I even wore shorts outside the house for the first time since leaving Dubai in January. I'd just be trying to stop myself from feeling so guilty, however, that their trip has been so disappointing. It's making it really hard to recommend afternoons in Prater, or Mauerpark, or the Tiergarten. Good one, Berlin.

Intermission

Hello again. Sorry, I know it's been a while between decent posts. We had absconded internationally again, visiting Denmark and Sweden. It was tremendous and Copenhagen is truly brilliant - so many bicycles and sexy bicycle legs! Still, it does feel good to be back home in Berlin. 

By the way, we ate very well in Copenhagen, mostly, but it was pretty tough to find vegetarian and gluten-free options. Much, much harder than Berlin, at any rate. (That's not entirely the reason I'm glad to be back but it's a contributor and blog relevant).

In the meantime, while I work up the enthusiasm to write another donuts post, here is a photo of me enjoying a beer on the mean streets of Berlin, just in case you didn't believe me when I wrote about how awesome it was.

Prost!

oh no.

The manchild what scribbles those stupid faces on walls in Prenzlauer Berg must have been given a bicycle for a gift or something. 

I just spotted one of the hideous visages on my lunch break in Kreuzberg.

Fuck. 

Rude Shock, Happy Ending

I didn't buy my usual bargain beers at the weekend just past. Our bags were heavy enough with Vicky's booze (gluten free beers and organic cidre) so I gave our shoulders a break and the beers a miss. It would be okay, I naively thought; I have rum at home.

Well, I finished off the rum on Monday and decided to have an alcohol-free day on Tuesday. What I fool I was. It was a rough day at work, I was home later than I'd hoped and, after I flopped onto the bed, Vicky popped open one of her beers and settled in next to me (we are too povo for a couch). 

I put my shoes back on and trekked five doors down to the Asian mini-mart (note: not open on Sundays) where I was charged the exorbitant sum of €2.40 for two cold beers. Okay, sure, some of that cost is the pfand deposit but I won't be the one to return the bottles. Doing so would rob the neighbour children an income.

My point is: if you're a recovering alcoholic, Berlin may not be the best place to visit. If you're anybody else, it's flipping ace. If you're a small boy, there's money to be made in my building's recycling bin. 

Shopping in Berlin is maximally munted

I don't mean this to come off as a massive whinge. One of the reasons I left Australia (albeit temporarily) was to get away from an endlessly-whining upper middle class complaining that governments weren't giving them enough free money. To turn into one of those horrid, self-entitled arseholes after leaving would make me very, very ashamed. Also, there is an awful lot that I love about Berlin. There's great, big heaving armloads of things to love. Too much for one man to hold in his manly arms!

But seriously, Berlin, shopping here is really fucked.

Famous

The citizens of Berlin have taken Vicky into their hearts.

My friend Wickie

They also seem well aware of her penchant for funny hats. 

:O

In Norway he's know as "Willy".

He's got more names than Santa Claus, this bloke.